Three years from the sun
Sour Water
Slowly, the sea smallens. You learn to live with how
you love. If a river can course this, you can too.
From Ulrichen snow to Cahuilla sand, a journey
you never knew would take such time to know you.
It might well have become a harsh glaciation of sour water
were it not for the kisses that buttered the warm gipfeli
with morning sun and her gracing mouth. A winter road
through The Goms brought houses built on collared stones
that crowded the iceway’s edge and kept rooting longtails
from finding their way into the larder of your loving fires.
And the moving unribboned behind you like a spool raveling
in reverse until you’re motoring Temecula past midnight
and the low moon tilts westward in a black sombrero,
somewhere out over some place you cannot see from
here but know exists, driven in sway and drift amid
the scattered shallows of all your vacant imaginings.
The crying comes not so much as before as if some polished
spigot served its purpose for once, alone on your way home,
with not one song lacerating the sac of your dear sorrow or
blurring the stars causing them to run via lactea down
the desert of your saltless face. This is the drying sea you
once thought fathomless, rifted to the very core of the earth
with the wound of love let go, of love let loose for a sudden
season before the world tilted three years away from the sun.
You are an island tonight. All the blue worry of misread
soundings that circled the current of all you’ve endured
has brought you here to chartlessness and tranquil anchorage.
She has left you ripened plantains in a bowl. A note set in her
own hand reads: Gone another ocean away. Won’t be home.
Wait up late if you wish. So you do, for nothing, for the practice
of waiting up for no one. Into these hours swell the brackish
smalling of the sea. You learn to live with how you love.
Joseph Gallo
July 9, 2006
2 Comments:
I wrote this poem after leaving JoAnn's house on my way home. It was a long-awaited moment for me as I at last felt the relief of sufficient time having passed and the release of this grief and sorrow I'd been carrying for some three years since last seeing Nicole when I dropped her off at LAX on October 4, 2003.
Time takes time and the bridge under which the water runs will not be hurried.
You learn to live with how you love.
The timing is perfect, the divine universe at work again. It was three years ago he left, but the sun had been gone in us nearly 20 years. I would have done anything to save him, I would have done anything to save our family, ...he was wounded, I was wounded. Soon he will deliver the death blow to our 30 year marriage.
Out of the waiting for the door that never opens again, a new life slowly unfolds. I find myself on a new path, with more joy and bliss than ever imagined. Did the universe know, this was to be my gift, for never giving up on my love for him. Out of the stillness comes the knowing with him gone, I won't die, no the dawn shows me I will dance truly for the first time.
You learn to live with how you love. Now the water flows on the tiles for the first time.
Oh dear Joseph, thank you eternally for this. Your prose breathes life into my soul. L
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